Jack-O - Dir. Steve Latshaw 1995

Okay, so this wasn’t a dare. This was something that I wanted to rent. I got back from my 2 month “vacation” in the northeast yesterday evening, but I haven’t made it to the video store. Fortunately, Jack-O was waiting for me when I got home (thank you Netflix). This movie is super bad. Not “Superbad”, which was good, but super bad, which is bad. Which is surprising, considering that it features a Carradine, Brinke Stevens (of “Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama” and “The Slumber Party Massacre” fame), and Linnea Quigley (who, here, gets the top billing she so often deserves, but is frequently stripped of). Not the worst thing I’ve ever seen by a long shot, but my hopes were way up in the air before I even put the disc in.

The Plot: The last descendant (who happens to be about 9 years old) of a dude who kills a demon must fight a scarecrow type thing 80 years after its last grave rising. His ineffectual family and a babysitter sent from the heavens (Linnea, of course) help him with his cause on Halloween night. There are some dream sequences and a moderately extended shower scene, but as far as plot goes, that’s about it.

What Makes It Watch-able: I actually thought that this film approached real horror movie status, which was a pleasant surprise. There were a couple of scenes where the “pumpkin man” was honestly creepy. The problem was that this movie’s budget and other restraints totally held it back from being something spectacular. The cast was descent; the effects, though mostly crappy, had a certain charm. The story wasn’t great, but it wasn’t particularly bad. I think that it just took itself too seriously in the wrong places, and not seriously enough in others. The possibility was there. Watching this made me feel like a mother catching her kid smoking pot before the SATs. The potential really was there, but it missed the mark.

On the upside, there were a few scenes that will keep a viewer not unlike myself (I believe the appropriate terminology is “craphound”) going. A lady tries to attack the Jack-O with a butter knife–the results are worth watching. Linnea is in top form as always, and, in my humble opinion, carried the movie. There’s this fat guy with a pretty funny laugh. The killing is usually sub-par, but a couple of times, pumpkin man does a descent job.

One thing to watch for in the film: try and figure out the radius of where things take place. The Jack-O in action is relatively slow. He can’t catch a kid half his size even if they’re 2 feet away from each other, but he can appear at places that should be halfway across town in a millisecond. This wouldn’t surprise me so much (I mean, he IS a demon back from the grave) if the other characters couldn’t magically appear wherever they wanted, as well. Either this town is the size of a broom closet, or it’s built on a wormhole. Or Prince built it in the future and brought it back with him, along with his music that shouldn’t exist yet. Whatever the reason, throughout the incredible amount of exposition in this film, they never mention how everyone can get everywhere whenever they need to be there.

All that being said, I thought that the movie as a whole was OK. The last half hour was almost good–the first 45 minutes was awful.

Breaks Needed: 0
Averted Eyes: 0
Rating from 1 to 10: 4.5

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